Get to the top: How to achieve a female orgasm
Get to the top: How to achieve a female orgasm
Blog Article
Whether you’re with a partner or flying solo, women often face more barriers to orgasm. From a lack of biological knowledge to mental blocks, it’s no surprise that 20% of women claim they’ve never orgasmed, and a shocking 50% wish they could orgasm more.
Though the female orgasm is less taboo than before, it has historically been a subject of debate, leading to misunderstandings and a lack of pleasure for women worldwide. But we want to change that! Keep reading to understand the general components of the female orgasm and discover how you can increase your chances of having one.
Why Are Women Less Likely to Orgasm?
Before diving into the tips for achieving orgasm, it’s essential to discuss the concept of the orgasm gap. This term refers to the difference between male and female orgasms, particularly in the context of heterosexual sex. Studies have shown that 49% of wives in newlywed couples achieve consistent orgasms, while a staggering 87% of husbands do.
The reasons for this gap remain unclear. Some experts attribute it to biological differences, while others point to a lack of sexual education and lingering societal shame surrounding female sexuality and pleasure.
How to Have Your First Orgasm
If you haven’t orgasmed before but are interested in reaching your peak, it’s important to note that real orgasms aren’t like the screaming finales you see in films. While some may have that reaction, others don’t. The key is to take the pressure off yourself and reframe your goals. Instead of viewing orgasm as an ultimate achievement, focus on simply enjoying the pleasure.
Here are some tips to enhance your experience:
- Consider It a Journey
Focus on the journey rather than the destination. This mindset can help eliminate mental blocks that might be hindering your ability to orgasm. - Make Sure You’re in a Comfortable Surrounding
Choose a location where you feel relaxed and won’t be distracted or interrupted. Knowing you’re in a safe space allows for a more enjoyable experience. - Take Time to Get in the Mood
Engage in activities that turn you on, such as reading erotic stories, watching pornography, or using your imagination. - The Physical Stuff
Explore different sensations and techniques. If you have a vagina and clitoris, start by massaging the area above your clit, gradually working your way down. Experiment with pressure and speed to discover what feels best for you. Consider incorporating vaginal penetration with fingers or toys for varied sensations.
What If You Don’t Orgasm?
If you’ve tried and not succeeded, don’t panic. Some people find it easier to orgasm than others. Reflect on your last attempt: Did you feel close to orgasm? Did you enjoy the sensations? Were you feeling stressed? Life stressors can impact your ability to feel pleasure. Consider trying again with different approaches.
If at any point masturbation or sex feels less pleasurable, it’s essential to set boundaries and stop.
Should You See a Doctor If You Can’t Orgasm?
It's usually not necessary to visit your GP if you can't orgasm unless you experience pain or signs of infection. Instead, consider addressing your concerns with a sex therapist. These professionals focus on the psychological aspects of sexuality, helping with communication, body confidence, sex education, and overcoming mental blocks related to orgasm.
What Actually Happens to Your Body When You Orgasm?
Understanding the biological responses during orgasm can be helpful. Physical symptoms of an orgasm in women include:
- A sudden release of sexual tension
- Increased blood pressure and heart rate
- Quick, short breaths
- Involuntary muscle contractions (e.g., in feet, abdomen, or legs)
- Contractions of the vagina and uterus
Not every orgasm will involve all of these symptoms, and that’s perfectly normal.
Other Ways to Increase the Chances of Orgasm
Experimenting with different elements can help enhance your experience. Here are some common turn-ons that may inspire your sex life:
- Spend more time on foreplay or external stimulation.
- Incorporate a romantic narrative into your session.
- Explore touching non-sexual parts of your body.
- Engage in kissing with a partner.
- Experiment with sensory elements, such as blindfolds or temperature play.
The Takeaway
Orgasms might feel a world away, but as you continue to explore pleasure, you’ll get closer to that elusive peak. Remember to take the pressure off yourself and focus on enjoyment. If you only concentrate on achieving orgasm, it may take the joy out of the experience and leave you feeling frustrated.
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